Beginning
by Audreylie
Summary: * read the first chapter to understand * Meredith Grey, daughter of a renowned surgeon, begins her surgical internship at a Seattle hospital. In this difficult business competition rages, she will meet his colleagues and holders. Everyone lives in this hospital ... to link private life and professional career.
1. chapter 1

**I was bet. Grey's anatomy version "book". So I will take up the challenge. I don't know how far it will go, but I hope to do a lot of season and of course, all the characters will be there, all the stories will be too. It's crazy, but a challenge is a challenge.**

 **POV** **Meredith**

The game: They say a person either has what it takes to play or they don't. My mother was one of the greats. Me on the other hand... I'm kinf of screwed.

Richard: Each of you comes here today hopeful, waiting in on the game. A month ago, you were in med school being taught by doctors. Today... you are the doctors. The seven years you spend here as a surgical resident will be the best and worst of your life.You will be pushed to the breaking point. Look around you. Say hello to your competition. Eight of you will switch to an easier speciality. Five will crack under the pressure. Two of you will be asked to leave. This your starting line. This your arena. How well you play, that's up to you.

 _While the man spoke, he attributed the residents, a woman, small black-skinned, waiting for us at the end of the hall. She had the head of the person who had no joy at having to endure young aspiring to become a doctor. A little hesitant, we went to her._

Bailey: l have five rules. Memorize them. Rule number one: Don't bother sucking up. l hate you. That's not gonna change. Trauma protocol, phone list, pagers, nurses will page you. You will answer every page at a run. A run! That's rule number two. Your first shift starts now and lasts 48 hours. You're interns, grunts, nobodies, bottom of the surgical food chain. You run labs, write orders, work every second night until you drop, and don't complain. On-call rooms. Attendings hog them. Sleep when you can where you can, which brings me to rule number three. lf l'm sleeping, don't wake me unless your patient is dying. Rule four: The dying patient better not be dead when l get there. Not only will you have killed someone, you woke me for no reason. We clear ?

Meredith: You said five rules. That was only four. "I say, raising my hand."

Bailey: Rule number five. When l move, you move.

 _His pager started ringing. I knew what it meant, I knew it was a patient who needed us. Quickly, we rushed down the hall to go to the roof..._

Bailey: What do we got ?

"Katie Bryce, 15-year-old, new onset seizures, intermittent for the past week. lV lost en route, started grand mal seizing as we descended."

Bailey : All right, get her on her side lzzie, 10 milligrams Diazepam lM. Cristina, you're on labs. George, patient work-ups. Meredith, get Katie for a CT. She's your responsibility now. Izzie, you get to do rectal exams.

 _Pushing the bed on which Katie was lying, my patient, I was walking down the halls in search of the scanner room. Bailey had made a quick tour of the place, way too fast for me to remember all the places._

Katie :You're lost.

Meredith : l'm not lost. How are you feeling ?

Katie : l'm missing my pageant.

Meredith : You're missing your pageant ?

Katie : The Spokane Teen Miss. l was in the top ten after the first two rounds. This is my year. l could have won. You're so lost. What are you, like, new ? l twisted my ankle in talent rehearsal. l do rhythmic gymnastics, which is, like, really cool. Nobody else does it. And l tripped over my ribbon. And l didn't get stuck with someone this clueless, and that was, like, a nurse.

 _Arriving in the room, the examination was done. My morning just started, and I had enough already. The midday break was one of the best things that could happen to me. My friends, if I can call them that, were all sitting at a table, chatting._

Meredith : Katie Bryce is a pain in the ass. lf l hadn't taken the Hippocratic Oath, l'd Kevorkian her with my bare hands.

Burke : Good afternoon, interns. «He said approaching our table.» lt's posted, but l thought l'd share the good news personally. As you know, the honor of performing the first surgery is reserved for the intern that shows the most promise. As l'm running the OR today, l get to make that choice. George O'Malley.

George: Me ?

Burke: You'll scrub in for an appendectomy this afternoon. Congratulations. Enjoy.

 _Katie's parents arrived, I went to her room. They wanted to understand what was happening, what had happened to him. Of course, in their place I would need explanations and I would seek to have some._

Meredith: l'm not the doctor. l'm a doctor, but l'm not Katie's doctor, so l'll go get him for you.

 _Walking down the hall, I caught Bailey. I was hoping she could inform me, I did not have any other options anyway. I did not know more than anyone what was going on with Katie._

Meredith: Katie's parents have questions. Do you talk to them, or do l ask Burke ?

Bailey: No, Burke's off the case. Katie belongs to the new attending now, Dr. Shepherd. He's over there.

Derek: Meredith, can l talk to you for a second ?

 _Turning around, I realized that the man I slept with the day before was not a stranger. A stranger for ever._


	2. Chapter 2

Meredith: Dr. Shepherd.

Derek : Dr. Shepherd ? This morning it was Derek. Now it's Dr. Shepherd.

Meredith: Dr. Shephed we should pretend it never happened.

Derek: What never happened ? You sleeping with me last night ? Or you throwing me out this morning.Because both are fond memories I'd like to hold onto.

Meredith: No. There will be no memories. I'm not the girl in the bar anymore and you're not the guy.This can't exist. You get that, right ?

Derek: You took advantage of me and now you want to forget about it.

Meredith: I did not take …

Derek: I was drunk, vulnerable and good looking and you took advantage.

Meredith: Okay I was the one who was drunk and you are not that good looking.

Derek: Maybe not today. Last night ? Last night I was very good looking. I had my red shirt on. My good looking shirt. You took advantage.

Meredith: I did not take advantage.

Derek: Want to take advantage again ? Say Friday night ?

Meredith: No. You're an attending. And I'm your intern.Stop looking at me like that !

Derek: Like what ?

Meredith: Like you've seen me naked.Dr. Shepherd ! This is inappropriate.Has that ever occurred to you ?*I say, leaving the stairs.*

 _Leaving quickly, I didn't want to continue this discussion. Nobody had to know anything about what was happening, had happened. Not knowing what to do, I decided to go to the operating room, in the gallery, a window to see what was happening. George had obtained the first operation. Everyone at the announcement, had noticed that he was not ready. It was to wonder what he was doing there, in medicine. Many others were there, wanting to admire what was going on. I felt that Cristina had a certain disgust at not being in George's place. From the beginning, she looked so competitive._

Intern #1: He's gonna faint. He's a fainter.

Intern #2: Nah code brown. Right in his pants.

Intern #1: He's all about the flop sweat. He's gonna sweat himself unsterile.

Intern #3: 10 bucks says he messes up the McBurney.

Cristina: 10 says he cries.

Intern #2: I'll put 20 on a total meltdown.

Meredith: 50 says he pulls the whole thing off.That's one of us down there. The first one of us. Where's your loyalty ?

Cristina: 75 says he can't even I.D the appendix.

Izzie: I'll take that action.

*

George: Scalpel.

Doctor: Scalpel.

Burke: More pressure. The human flesh is a tough shell. Dig in.

George: Pick-ups.

Doctor: Pick-ups.

George: Clamp.

Doctor: Clamp.

George: Let's go … I'm there.

George: Scalpel.

Doctor: Scalpel.

George: Appendix is out.

Burke: Not bad.

George: Thank you.

Burke: Now all you have to do is invert the stump into the cecum. And simultaneously pull up on the per strings but be careful not to … break them. You ripped the cecum. Got a bleeder. Filling with stool. What do you now?

George: Ah … ah …

Burke: Think. Start the suction and you start digging for those per strings before she bleeds to Buckie give him a clamp.

Buckie: BPs dropping.

Burke: Today ! Pull your balls out of your back pocket. Lets go.What are you waiting for ? Suction.

Doctor: We're getting too low folks.

Buckie: Dr. Burke.

Burke: Get out of the way. Pansy ass idiot. Get him out of here. Suction. Clamp.

*

 _We went out to get some fresh air. George needed it and all we could do was comfort him. Missing his first operation didn't give a good image of the person. While we talked, a beeper rang. Each of us glanced at his, when I realized it was mine and this damn_ Katie.

Meredith: Oh man. It's 911 for Katie Bryce.I gotta go.

Meredith: Excuse me ! Excuse me !*I say, running off down to the hall.*

 _Arriving in his room, I thought there was a real urgency. I wish it were, but no. Just this girl reading a magazine. I tried to contain my nerves as much as possible._

Katie: Took you long enough.

Merdith: You're okay ? The nurse paged me 911.

Katie: I had to go all exorcist to get her to even pick up the phone

Meredith: Wait. There's nothing wrong with you ?

Katie: Been bored.

Meredith: You little … I'm not a cruise director.

Katie: You don't have to wig out. Pageant is supposed to be on cable but this crappy hospital doesn't get the channel. If that cow Kylie Witterson walks off with my crown, I hafta see it. Can you call someone ?

Meredith: Okay. This is an actual hospital. There are sick people here. Go to sleep and stop wasting my time.

Katie: But I can't sleep. My head's all full.

Meredith: That's call thinking. Go with it.*I say, coming out of the room.*

 _Entering a post op room, I don't understand what I do, but I escape this patient. All I see is another intern who is fighting with a nurse and who as I arrive, leave._

Alex: God I hate nurses. I'm Alex. I'm with Jeremy. You're with the Nazi right ?

Meredith: She may not have pneumonia you know ? She could be splinting or have a PE.

Alex: Like I said I hate nurses.

Meredith: What did you just say ?Did you just call me a nurse?

Alex: Ah if the white cap fits.

Meredith: Damn it Katie.*I say when my pager rings again.*

 _Arriving in the lobby, I see people jostling, I understand that for once, it's a real emergency. Hurrying, I arrive in front of his room and suddenly, my vision become blurred. The room seems blurry._

Tyler: She's having multiple grand mall seizures. Now how do you want to proceed ?Dr. Grey, are you listening to me ? She's got diazepam. 2mg morazopam. I just gave a second dose. Dr. Grey you need to tell us what you want to do. Dr. Grey!

Meredith: Okay she's full on the morazopam ?

Nurse #3: She's had 4mg.

Meredith: You paged Dr. Bailey Dr. Shepherd ?

Tyler: The morazopam is not working.

Meredith: Phenolbarbitol. Load her with phenolbarbitol.

Tyler: Pheno's in.

Nurse #3: No change.

Meredith: You paged Dr. Shepherd

Nurse #3: I just told you.

Meredith: Well page him again. Stat.

Tyler: What do you wanna do ? Dr. Grey you need to tell us what you wanna do. Heart's stopped.

Nurse #4: Code blue! Code blue! … Code blue! Code blue!

Merdith: Charge paddles to 200.

Nurse #3: Charged. Clear.

Tyler: Still V-FIB. Nothing.

Nurse #3: Charging. 19 secs.

Meredith: Charge them to 300.

Nurse #3: 300.

Nurse #3: 27 secs.

Meredith: Charge them to 360. Come on Katie.

Nurse #3: 49 secs.

Tyler: It's 60 secs. You're supposed to administer another bug.

Meredith: Charge again!Charge again!!!

Nurse #4: Anything?

Nurse #3: I see sinus rhythm.

Tyler: Blood pressure is coming up.

Nurse #4: Pressure's returning.

Nurse #3: Rate's coming back.

 _This is just professional, that's what I thought when Derek enter. He's here for Katie._


	3. Chapter 3

"What the hell happened ?"

" She had a seizure and her heart stopped."

"A seizure ? You were supposed to be monitoring her !"

" I checked on her …"

 _Coming out, looking sad, I walk down the hall when Bailey interrupts me. On her face, I see that she is not in a good mood, to tell the truth, me too._

" You get a 911, you page me immediately ! Not in the 5 minutes it takes you to the emergency. Immediately ! You're on my team and if somebody dies it's my ass, you hear me ! Grey ! "

 _Continuing to advance, Cristina interrupts me but i don't listen. I go outside, in the rain, whatever the weather, I find a corner of grass and i vomit. I needed it, my day becomes more and more bad._

"Meredith ?"

"You tell anyone … ever …" I say, Cristina behind me.

 _Back, we are invited to a room, a kind of conference room. I don't know what awaits us, but what I do know is that it can't be worse than this start of the day._

" What are you doing ?" I say to cristina suturing a banana.

" I'm suturing a banana with the vain hope that it wakes up my brain."

"What are you smiling at 007 ? I'm sorry I get mean when I'm tired." Cristina replied to George who had just laughed.

"You know what ? … I don't care. I comforted a family and I get to hang out in the O.R. today. All is well."

"Does anybody know why we're here ?" Cristina asked.

 _No sooner had Cristina asked her question than Derek came in. He cleared his voice before addressing us._

" Well good morning. I'm gonna do something that's pretty rare for a surgeon. I'm gonna ask interns for help.I've got this kid Katie Bryce. Right now she's a mystery. She doesn't respond to our meds, labs are clean, scans are pure but she's having seizures. Grand mall seizures with no visible cause.She's a ticking clock. She's gonna die if I don't make a diagnosis. Which is where you come in. I can't do it alone. I need your extra minds, extra eyes. I need you to play detective. I need you to find out why Katie is having seizures.I know you're tired, your busy, you got more work than you can possibly handle. I understand. So I'm going to give you an incentive, whoever finds the answer rides with me. If Katie needs surgery, you get to do what no other interns get to do, scrub in to assist on advance procedure.Dr. Bailey is going to hand you Katie's chart. The clock is ticking fast people. If we're going to save Katie's life we have to do it soon.

 _Dr. Shepherd go out, we take a copy of Katie's file. Alex talking with a nurse, I can not help but listen to him._

"Give the antibiotics time to work." Alex said sighing.

" The antibiotics should've worked by now."

" She's old. She's friggin' ancient. She's lucky she's still breathing … I got a shot to scrub in downstairs with a patient who wasn't alive during the civil war. Don't page me again."

 _Seeing him leave, I did the same. Cristina didn't hesitate to follow me and catch me._

" Hey I want in on Shepherd's surgery. You've been the intern on Katie since the start. You wanna work together ? We find the answer, we have a 50/50 chance of scrubbing in."

" I'll work with you but I don't want in on the surgery. You can have it."

" Are you kidding ? It's the biggest opportunity any intern will ever get."

" I don't want to spend any more time with Shepherd then I have to."

"What do you have against Shepherd ?"

" If we find the answer the surgery is yours. Do you wanna work together or not ?"

"Deal."

 _Entering a room, we head to a pile of books, anything that could help us_ understand what Katie has.

" So she doesn't have anoxia, chronic renal failure or acidosis. It's not a tumor because her CT's clean." Cristina said sighing."Are you seriously not gonna tell me why you won't work with Shepherd ?"

"No. What about infection ? "

" No. Ah there's no white count. She has no CT lesions. No fevers. Nothing in her spinal tap. … Just tell me."

" You can't comment, make a face or react in anyway.We had sex."

" What about an aneurysm ? "

" No blood on the CT. No headaches."

" Okay. There's no drug use. Ah no pregnancy. No trauma. … Was he good ? I mean he looks like he would be. Was it any good ? "

" We're out of answers. What if no one comes up with anything ?"

" You mean what if she dies ?"

" Yeah."

" Oh this is gonna sound really bad but I really wanted that surgery."

" She's just never gonna get the chance to turn into a person. The sum total of her existence will be almost winning miss teen whatever. … You know what her pageant talent is ? "

" They have talent?"

" Rhythmic gymnastics."

" Oh, oh come on." Said Cristina laughing.

" What is rhythmic gymnastics ? I don't know. I can't even say it. I don't know what it is." I say, smiling.

" Isn't it something with like a ball and ah …What? … Meredith what ? "

" Get up. Come on."

 _Running down the hall, Derek was about to get in the elevator when Cristina intercepted him._

" Oh, oh Dr. Shepherd. Just one moment um…Katie competes in beauty pageants."

": I know that but we have to save her life anyway."

" Okay she has no headaches, no neck pain, her CTs clean … Ah there's no medical proof of an aneurysm."

" Right."

"But what if she has an aneurysm anyway ?"

" There are no indicators."

" Ah but she twisted her ankle a few weeks ago when she was practicing for the pageant"

" Okay I'm sure you're trying to help…"

" She fell when she twisted her ankle. She fell." I say, interrupting him.

"It was no big deal. Not even a bump on the head. You know she got right back up. Iced her ankle and everything was fine but it was a fall so minor her doctor didn't even think to mention it when I was taking her history.But she did. She did fall."

" Well you know what the chances that minor fall can burst into an aneurysm ? One in a million! Literally." He said, closing elevator door.

" could've gone throughout her entire life without it ever being a problem."

" Right." Said Cristina.

" One tap in the right spot…" Said Derek

" Right spot."

" Exactly. Now I get to fix it. You 2 did great work. Love to stay and kiss your asses but I got tell Katie's parents she's having surgery.

" Ah, ah Dr. Shepherd you said that you'd, you'd pick someone to scrub in if we helped." Say Cristina.

" Oh yes right. Um, I'm sorry I can't take you both. It's gonna be a full house. Meredith I'll see you in O.R."

 _Cristina didn't bother to react, she left angry. I call her, she does not deign to turn around._


	4. Chapter 4

_I knew why Derek had chosen me, to the detriment of Cristina. I knew his reasons but it could not be the case. I didn't want our "relationship" to be a benefit and I understood Cristina's reaction. After what she had learned, she could only be angry. The competition is raging, and she has reason to think that I will not have to fight for anything when Derek has to choose between several interns. I find her at the end of the hall, talking to Izzie and I needed to talk to him, to really talk to him._

"I'll tell him I changed my mind …" I said.

"You know don't give … don't do me any favors. It's fine."

" Cristina."

" You know what you did a cut throat thing. Deal with it. Don't come to me for absolution. You wanna be a shark. Be a shark."

" I'm not. I'm …"

" Oh yes you are. Only it makes you feel bad in all your warm gooey places.You know screw you. I don't get picked for surgeries because I slept with my boss andI didn't get into med school because I have a famous mother ! You know some of us have to earn what we get."

 _His words hurt me, I didn't reply and left. Finding a small room, I see Derek busy preparing Katie for an intervention, she sleeping, a perfect time to talking with him._

" Promised her I'd make her look cool.Apparently being a bald beauty queen is the worse thing that happened in the history of the world."

" Did you choose me for the surgery because I slept with you ? " I said.

" Yes.I'm kidding."

" I'm not gonna scrub in for surgery. You should ask Cristina. She really wants it."

" You're Katie's doctor. And on your first day with very little training you helped save her life. You earned the right to follow her case through to the finish. You shouldn't let the fact that we had sex get in the way of you taking your shot."

 _Not wanting to hear another word, I decide to go out. A window sill on the outside, I sit down, George not long to join me._

" I wish I wanted to be a chef. Or a ski instructor. Or a kindergarten teacher." I said.

" You know I would've been a really good postal worker. I'm dependable.You know my parents tell everyone they meet that their son's a surgeon. As if it's a big accomplishment. Superhero or something. If they could see me now."

" When I told my mother that I wanted to go to medical school, she tried to talk me out of it. Said I didn't have what it takes to be a surgeon. That I'd never make it. So the way I see it, superhero sounds pretty damn good."

" We're going to survive this, right ?" He said, a smile sketching my lips as I get up .

 _I pass the doors of the OR Derek is already there but I don't care, until he speaks._

" All right everybody. It's a beautiful night to save lives. Let's have some fun."

 _I can't think of any one reason on why I want to be a surgeon. But I can think of a thousand reasons why I should quit They make it hard on purpose.There are lives in our hands.There comes a moment when … it's more than just a game. And you either take that step forward. Or turn around and walk away. I could quit. But here's the thing. I love the playing field_

 _I watched Derek and what he was doing more than acting on the patient. When the operation ends, that I am rid of my second surgical gown, I leave the OR. Finding a chair, I sit there, Cristina passes near to me and stops._

" It was a good surgery." She says.

" Yeah." I said.

" We don't have to do that thing you know where I say something and then you say something and then somebody cries and there's like a moment …"

" Yeah."

" Good. … You should get some sleep. You look like crap."

" I look better than you."

" Oh, it's not possible."

 _Cristina rises while Derek between, speaking at a nurse in front of me. After a few minutes, he turns in my direction._

" That was amazing." I said.

" Hmmm."

" You practice on cadavers. You observe. And you think you know what you're gonna feel like standing over that table but … that was such a high. I don't know why anybody does drugs."

" Yeah." He says.

" Yeah."

" I should … ah… go do this"

" You should." I said.

" I'll see you around."

 _So, I made it through my first shift. We all did. The other interns are all good people. You'd like them. I'd think. I dunno. Maybe.I like them._

 _Running in the rain, I enter a house, my shift ends. My mom is sitting in a chair and a lot of people are there. I know I planned to sell the house, his house. But I think it's my duty to keep it. I think it's the best thing to do._

"I change my mind. i don't sell the house. I'm gonna keep it. I'll have to get a couple of roommates but its home you know ?" I said.

" Are you the doctor ?" She says.

" No. I'm not your doctor. But I am a doctor."

" What's your name ?"

" It's me mom. Meredith."

"Alright.I used to be a doctor I think." She says.

 _I take his hand in mine._

" You are a doctor mom. You're a surgeon."


End file.
